When life gave Baba beets she made borscht. When it placed cucumbers into her capable hands, she cut them in rings and made a appetizing salad. Succulent zucchinis went into a hot box and out popped a delicious loaf. When she was presented with vinegar, she added a little salt and some tomatoes. When life spit out hard soil after a cold lifeless winter, she found a way even in her late 80's to churn that soil so it would yield a crop.
She lived her life with a kind of simple, optimistic tenacity and refused to dwell on the colorless or complaining of how things 'woulda, coulda, shoulda been'. She was always the one that 'did'!
When life presented lemons, in her humble, quiet and efficient way, Annie seemed to make a simple but palatable lemonade that always came with a sweet crystals of laughter. To keep her body busy and agile, Baba tended to a garden that would make her friend Emeril Lagasse come running for the freshness if he only knew. The entirety of her large back yard for years was a fruit and veggie dreamers delight and with tender love and care yielded the most amazing produce. It was a mouthwatering smorgasboard. We were spoiled. And she loved spoiling us.
If you wanted soup and the wisdom that came with it, you would find yourself sauntering through the back gate and down the little path surrounded by green. As you approached her perched on her rustic little 'survivor of the dirty 30's' bench', you would be greeted with a large smile brimming from ear to ear, a tilt back and forth of the head and little snickers originating in the belly as if to say "Hee Hee Hee I'm up to something". "Good morning. Come look what I have for you," the low and steady voice would say as your attention was drawn to the weathered hands with fresh dirt under the nails. You know this farmer had been up with the rooster.
"Potatoe beetle soup on the menu for lunch. I've been working on this soup all morning especially for you," she would tease as she used her pointer to stir the brew. You looked into the old plastic yogurt container sitting in the shade against the garage.....beetle upon beetle plucked from the perfectly hilled potatoes early that morning by farmer Annie were sitting in a nice thick marinade. You couldn't help but laugh. Sometimes beetle steaks were on the menu and at other times Annie would serve up a healthy helping of potatoe beetle pot pie. I was always curious to know what concoctions would come about if Annie had taken the time to learn of the blender. Farmer Annie was the wisest but and eldest KID in the class. She could have written a book about the 'ultimate kid concoctions' to serve up a happy healthy bite of life! For me, it was just fun to watch her little body get a workout from all the laughter.
Like any comedian, Annie thought she was funny. That's because she was! She would often chuckle at herself and her silliness. To be able to laugh at oneself and not take your daily life so seriously is a beautiful thing and perhaps the ingredient to longevity and quality of life. If you wanted to chuckle from the inside out, you know, those smilin' buddha laughs where you really gave your belly a massage, you could do it openly around the little white round table in the yellow kitchen. You were lucky if a mixture of cottage cheese and scallions didn't come through your nose to decorate the table as you dined at this fabulous restaurant. Or you might find yourself articulating a little emotion and expression of the healing kind for a few hours on the back porch whilst sitting on a makeshift rickety bench of three slabs nailed together. Forget the lawnchairs that were collecting dust in the garage.
When you went to Baba's you got the real deal. There was no hidden agenda or fabricated red carpet rolled out to please but somehow you felt as though you were important - a Hansel or Gretel when in her energy zone. Only, the witch in this story was a little Ukranian Baba made of goodness....well maybe with a sprig of mischeviousness as well.Baba kept an untrouble spirit. She dealt with things.
But like all passionate people, there was a deeper, more serious side and a perhaps an important message in the potatoe beetle story. Baba did not like parasites taking advantage of her Idahos, baby reds, and Yukon golds. Others who passively but aggressively invaded and potentially destroyed for their own selfish desires were not invited into her world. When it came to the people she cherished and loved... when she acted, it was always out of love. If there was a sniff of injustice or misconduct toward one of her loves, she wasn't afraid to upset the harmony in efforts to sanction atonement. She said that the shifts of fortune test much. Call it dirt farmer wisdom as her teachings were rooted in the understanding that it's within adversity and not propserity that we really know whom we can trust.
All descriptors of a person with passion, Annie was stubborn, strong-willed, at times guarded. Years and years of arduous backbending turned her into a desert cactus...armoured and protected. Once the armour fell away you had yourself warm fluids running internally and you quickly found yourself in the presence of a woman who could really laugh and love! She did have a stubbornly unyielding method and that's how she accomplished many a great. However, if you were able to present logistical reasoning as to why she should not tackle in this manner, she did listen. Intelligent woman do. In a society where we pride ourselves on lipstick and coverup,
Annie had nothing to prove and cared not to be the pleaser. In this world, there was comfort in being around that strength of soul. What you saw is what you got and if you didn't like it, you could lump it (as she would often say with a giggle.). Like no other, Baba was able to look at things in the face and know them really for what they were. When you did ask her advice, it would be the honest truth and was sometimes you were eating a fist full of soot. After you took a drink, cleared your throat, and laughed at how you could be so foolish, you were grateful for the honest cleanse.
Annie lived her life the way she wanted with no regrets and respected others enough to allow them to script theirs for themselves. Although she never said so, I knew she was effortlessly teaching me that 9/10ths of people were created so that we would want quality with the other tenth. Quality over quantity always.
To keep her mind busy, she became the word search Queen. The stores couldn't stalk those books quick enough for Amazing Annie. You'd be over one day and she was done half a book and then return 4 days later and she would be finishing book number two!
She was also a talented artist, who performed with quality. If she was to set her mind to something that was important to her, it was gone with individuality and excellence. Mistakes were allowed to be made but they had to be corrected. You saw this excellence in her handi-work. And when you mix quality with tenacity you yield some serious quantity.
Upon leaving her home one day she told me to wait by the door. Scurrying to the bedroom, after rumbling around in the closet for a short time, she came back with a few shopping bags full of material. "Here, these are for you." One after one she pulled out these most amazing multi-colored baby blankets. "These are for your children that you don't yet have. You are going to have children, yes?" At this time, I'd been married for nearly 5 years (old school thought dictated that one should have children after a year of marriage or something was wrong). Baba was old school. I wondered just how many babies she thought I was going to have. She'd made 5 blankets. The last year of her handi-work frenzie, Baba was churning out baby blankets, queen sized for big beds, throws, mittens. The greatest of gifts were to each of the three grandchildren. Huge intricate table cloths which were framed and a verbal card was attached to say, "to remember me by when I'm gone."
Shasta daisies were Baba's favorites. When I asked her why one day, she said, "Well of course my dear, they come up on their own and reach almost effortlessly to the sun. They are simple and beautiful." She added, "And.... you can decide whether he loves you or loves you not." Always the wise cracker! In the spring Baba was on the lookout to fill her flowerpots with pansies. But, she didn't believe in the pansy hug. We all know the limp hug that leaves you thinking, "Why did I bother?"
Every occasion of coming and going I recall my little 5 foot something Baba, greeting and saying goodbye at the front door. With a great amount of tenderness yet strength, reaching up to me, arms extended as if to grab me like a bear grabs its cub. She knew how to hug and hold! In comings and goings, Baba was never the first to offer the words 'I love you' but would respond with them and it was certainly implied with the silent tender fixation she gave when she looked directly into your eyes.
Forget about you loving her.....if you were fortunate to have her love reciprocated, it was endless, unconditional and your love tank was always full when you parted her company. She didn't NEED you to be self sufficient as she took a great deal of pride in being able to look after herself. But if you were fortunate to be someone she WANTED in her life, you left her home with a fullness in belly and soul and some for the road. Trunkloads of organic squash, zucchini, potatoes, cucumbers, carrots, tomatoes, raspberries, strawberries, peas, and even sunflowers to place upon the dinner table. You couldn't help but share the bounty with others.
People are often punching the popular line of time and it's healing qualities. Time doesn't heal. It only numbs the heartache so it's not as difficult to live in this sometimes lonely world on a day to day basis. When Annie lost her only child Natalka to cancer in the spring of 2001, it was so trying on her. Devastating. Both of us a little lost, together, we vowed to support one another in finding a 'new' normal. At the time, the incandescent bulb that shone brightly had just enough to light up a few minutes of the day. The laughter was minimal. So, you took what you could get.
Baba turned her focus inward for quite some time and when she would share stories of Natalka she began with laughter and pride but within no time at all, tears would fill her eyes. Annie would open up and talk about life on the farm with Natalka, life in the city, Natalka becoming a physician, marrying Alan and when her three grandchild came into the picture. Baba was a remarkable woman who had only one shot at raising a disciplined and moral child. She knew she was a great mother to Natalka and was very proud of her daughter in who she had become and what she had created for herself. She understood that much of that success fell on her shoulders as a parent who instilled moral fiber, goodness, and 'stick-to-it-ness" into her daughter. Many a story, many a tear shared and then quietly after the January snow that blankets the cold harsh ground begins to melt, she too began turning her love into full heat toward her three grandchildren, Debra, Janis, and Daniel and her son-in-law Alan (whom she called her adopted son). She lost her daughter but gained three adult grandchildren and a son. Baba felt blessed.
When she realized that pain is there for a reason, so that we know beauty, she began commenting on how beautiful life really was and gradually, although not fully the light transcended and invaded her darkness. One door closes and if we see the opporunity another will open.
Our only wish for Baba was that as she aged and the quality of her health deteriorated that the care she received increased. She was deserving.
The last three years of Annie's life were probably more difficult than the first 89 added together. She became trapped (like so many) in a world where the mind gets confused and the body begins to tell the mind, "I've had enough." It wasn't long before the spunk, oomph, and spirit slowly dwindled and the cheerlessness crept in. What to do when the mind is exhausted, the body worn out and bone-weary but the pacemaker continues to pump blood to and fro?
And finally after 3 years too many, this beautiful spirit housed within its physical shell has been released. Baba, you passed through at the most most opportune time for those you left behind....the time in all of our lives where we look at the past year in reflection and memorandum and welcome a new journey, a gift not yet opened in 2009.
To one of my dearest and most cherished of friends whom is also my blood, I feel priviledged to have truly known your heart. I feel proud to claim you as part of me for all of eternity. Your spirit and teachings reside in me and are even more pronounced now that your physical being is no longer. The moral fibrous thread weaves in and through my life's tapestry and I only realize now how thick and strong it really is. When I look in the mirror your incandescence shines back, your laughter fills my soul and awakens much joy from within. I go into 2009 with radiance. I know I'm a younger, taller, dafter Annie with a few distinct fixings of my own.
Within you passing over I have had another beautiful awakening.....for life really IS good if we choose it so. Life in your energy field was easy, full of laughter and zest. And now when I think of you I have to only perform one easy task.....to smile. Thank you for leaving me with this gift. Home is where the heart of our family is so I have no choice but to let you go to be with yours. Welcome home Baba. Even a soul as old as 92 can do the "I'm so happy jig" on the clouds without falling through.
Shine on!
Little snapper rock of the teeny tiniest degree!
One of the play yards.
Dem bones are getting ready to chase doze ducks......I can feel it!
And dat!
Up da hill! 
Across de meadow!
Back down de hill! 
Rest stop! 
Regenerating da love tank! 
I came here to dis park and then I went!
